Happy Friday the 13th...

In honor of Jason's big day, here's a reminder of what happens when it rains during "Halloween in July":


Yes, that's me in costume on the tarp, yet again. No, I'm not happy. And yes, I am screaming obscenities into my mask. Good times.

-- Dave

Happy Campers

I hate that term. It's done to death, already. Seriously. Google it. There's not a product under the sun that doesn't have a Happy Camper brand attached to it.

It seems like some people still use it to describe just about anything and everything ("Oh, so-and-so just got fired and he's not a happy camper." Or, "so-and-so must be a happy camper...she just won the lottery!"). And anyway, if someone is genuinely joyful or upset, do they really want people patronizing them by referring to them as happy or unhappy "campers?" Of course not. Generally, I avoid the term at all costs.

However, when it comes to the Cyclones Baseball Camp, I make an exception, since it's literally filled with hundreds of, well, happy campers.

Each year, Cyclones players and coaches work with kids on the fundamentals of the game, with a focus on fun. For me, the fun is in watching the interaction between the players and the kids. The kids get one-on-one time with professional athletes they idolize, and the players all seem to really open up around the kids - away from the pressures of the field, the media, etc. It's some of the most free and genuine interaction I see all summer. Not that i want to wax too nostalgic and have Ken Burns start doing a voiceover or anything, but it does kind of make you think about the purity of baseball, and how the game really affects so many lives.

Anyway, with that heartwarming fuzzy stuff being said, the Kids Camp also inevitably (and inadvertently) creates some pretty funny moments, too. Last year, Jordan Abruzzo started his batting lesson by saying three or four times that for safety purposes, no one was to swing a bat while they were in line -- only when they got to one of the appointed stations. Does everyone understand? "Yeah." I can't hear you! Does everyone understand? "YEAH!" No sooner did he turn around than one kid took a hack and accidentally clipped another, who, of course, hit the deck in a very dramatic scene (obviously, it's only funny because no one got hurt). The look on Jordan's face was absolutely priceless.

Yury Santana marveled at the talent level of the Brooklyn kids, as compared to camps he had done in other places. "These kids are no joke," he told me. "Some of them have better arms than guys on the team!"

And a couple of years ago, Edgar Ramirez became a Baseball Camp legend when he worked every day of the camp and created a cult following with his sense of humor, crazy antics, wacky nicknames, and phenomenal approach to teaching the kids. Because of the camp, that whole summer he was like the Pied Piper. Wherever he went, a trail of kids was following. "Edgar! Thanks for teaching me how to hit!" "Donkey! I was at the camp with you!" "I made the All-Star Team!" Those kids had a real connection to him, and vice versa. it was pretty cool to watch.

And now for the sales pitch:

Registration has begun for the 2009 Kids Camp. Check out all the dates and details, and get your kid in on the fun!

-- Dave

Nicknames

You may recall that a while back, I cast some celebs to play the parts of my colleagues in a hypothetical Brooklyn Cyclones movie. My favorite part about the whole activity was that I changed the pictures on their online profiles, and didn't tell them about it.

Word spread pretty quickly, unfortunately, and I've even gotten requests from family members to please take down some of the faux-tos in particular.

The pics are still up there, but since then, I've tinkered from time to time with other aspects of their profiles. For example, some of them may not actually know about the nicknames they have listed. Recently, Arnold Shortzenegger, Trick Daddy, and The Spy have all called me asking questions like: "When did you change my nickname?" (A while ago.) "What does that nickname even mean?" (If I told you, that would kill the joke.) "What the hell is wrong with you?" (Lots and lots.) and "Don't you have anything better to do?" (Unfortunately, no.)

Here's where you can get in on the joke. In most cases, the colleagues in question are either unaware or unappreciative of their new nicknames. So, of course, I think we should use them as frequently as possible. When you see your favorite staff member this summer, or when you call to place a ticket order, drop one of the nicknames into the conversation every once in a while and then pretend nothing's out of the ordinary. (Mini Plans are on sale now, by the way, so it's a good time to call 718-37-BKLYN)

Let's see who cracks first! It'll be fun.

-- Dave

Fun Can Be Hard Work

One of the best parts about working in the minors is that a major job responsibility is to generate fun.

A fun (and funny) atmosphere is at the heart of every one of our games. We are, for all intents & purposes, staging a fun-filled show each night in which there just happens to be some baseball being played, as well.

From t-shirt tosses to pink apes to dunk tanks to dizzy bats to pork rind sculptures to rally chickens to jousts to jugglers to processed meats racing on the warning track, you are sure to see something at every game that is unique, strange, and perhaps borderline insane...but above all, fun!

With that in mind, our staff met today with an expert in the Art of Fun (or, "Emperor of Fun" as it says on his business card), Dave Raymond, who for years was the man behind the antics of the Philly Phanatic (boooooo) and now helms the company that brings Reggy to KeySpan Park (yaaaaay).

Dave talked to us about some of his experiences as a mascot and a fun facilitator, and about what we can do to make the ballpark experience even more fun for all those involved.

One thing he said, in particular, rang true to me as it relates to the Cyclones. "We're giving fun away for free every night, but it is extremely valuable." It's true...you can't put a price tag on the enjoyment or memories a family gets during their time with the Cyclones. And that's something we try to keep in mind with everything that we implement. Almost every new idea, giveaway, or promotion is followed by the questions "Will the fans like it? Will they think it's fun?" (And sometimes we even think the answer might be yes!)

He also talked about a few other things that help in the process of fun-building -- things that I think we do a pretty good job of:

• Leadership. The people at the top have to foster a fun and creative environment for the staff. Check. Our GM occasionally dresses in a pink gorilla suit, sings showtunes at street fairs, encourages practical jokes, wackiness and creativity, and engages in countless other fun antics)
• Consistent Culture. Recognize the sense of humor of your group and its audience, and develop it daily. Focus on your strengths and build on them. Check. We're a tad bit dark and/or sarcastic at times, but that's us...and most of New York...and we have fun with it. Much of it is admittedly unsuitable for publication (i.e. Joyce as Atlas...long story...don't ask) but those things that do make it through our not-so-stringent filter seem to strike a chord with our core Brooklyn fans.
• Find the Funkillers. There will always be people who want to tell you why an idea WON'T work. Find them quickly. Embrace them and use them to help shape your idea until it WILL work. Or...just beat them over the head with fun until they see the light. Dave compared it to walking into a prison yard and picking a fight with the biggest, baddest, meanest guy you can find, as a means of taking a stand and establishing credibility. Steve noted that he would keep that in mind the next time he went to prison.
  

We've said for years that what's most important for a night or an idea to be succesful is that we as a staff are 100% behind it and having fun with it. Only then can we expect you guys to get behind it an enjoy it as well. Kind of like this blog -- an inside joke that's caught on with those outside the joke...who, by catching on, are now on the inside.

If you come to a game and you're laughing (or even chuckling, smirking, booing, or wondering what in H-E-double-hockey-sticks you just saw), then we consider the night a success -- win or lose.

So rest assured, Brooklyn baseball is not far away. And in the few months until Opening Day, I can promise you that we're hard at work on being as silly as we can and coming up with ideas that will make this summer one of the most fun you've ever had!

"Fun with a Purpose" as Mr. Raymond would say. (In my humble opinion, "Fun with a Porpoise" would be even better, but whatever.)

-- Dave

Solving Problems, One Mini Plan at a Time

I have a certain routine when I come into the office every morning: Head directly into the kitchen, grab a cup of coffee, say “hi” to Ricky, listen and nod as he pontificates on disturbing topics, and then head back to the Ticket Office. While waiting for the caffeine to kick in from said cup of coffee (and for my brain to scrub itself from said conversation with Ricky), I devote a few minutes of my morning to reading advice columns. This includes Dear Abby, Annie’s Mailbox, Dear Margo, etc. It’s a weird habit, but I like reading about other people’s enormous problems, knowing there’s a solution that can be outlined in a paragraph or two.

Now, with Mini Plans on sale and a plethora of new kinds of plans available, I like to think that the Brooklyn Cyclones contribute to solving the world’s woes.

Here’s how my very own personal advice column would go:

Dear Cyclones Ticket Office,

I got laid off from my job and have had to drastically slash our family’s entertainment budget. I don’t want to deprive my children, but how can we continue to have regular family outings without dipping into their college tuitions?

- Penny Pincher

Dear PP,

We’re glad you asked. The Brooklyn Cyclones offer a new Mini Plan called the Grub Club Plan: 5 games, plus free food. Each member of your family gets a hot dog, soft drink, chips & ice cream, every game. You can look forward to five family outings, at the cost of $75 per person. With the money you save, you’ll be able to put off looking for another job for at least eight more months.

- The T.O.

Dear Cyclones Ticket Office,

I know I should be grateful that I’m still gainfully employed, but my job involves staring at a spreadsheet all day and making numbers add up correctly. I feel myself falling into a deep depression, dreading each work week. And it gets worse in the summer when the sun is shining outside. What should I do to keep my motivation going?

- Working Doldrums

Dear WD,

We’re glad you asked. We have a new mini plan called the Hump Day Plan, with most of the games placed strategically in the middle of the work week. Then, you’ll know that your Wednesdays will end with baseball, a party atmosphere, and fun, attractive people (us). Soon, you’ll start looking forward to the end of the weekends and the start of the work week. Of course then, you can always pair your Hump Day Plan with our Weekend Plan.

- The T.O.

Dear Cyclones Ticket Office,

I’m an NYU law student with no money. I owe my bank $150,000 in student loans, and my friends don’t seem to understand that I can’t afford to drop endless amounts of cash on a night out in the city. This means I’m also losing friends. How do I have a social life without sacrificing tuition/rent money?

- Broke and Friendless

Dear BAF,

We’re glad you asked. #1) If you want to restock your supply of friends, join the Brooklyn Cyclones Facebook Fan Page. We’re here for you. #2) We have a new We Win, You Win Plan. It’s only $45, you get 3 games guaranteed, and a potential 3 games FREE. That’s $45 for a potential six nights out having fun. What does $45 get you in the city? The cover charge and a cocktail? We thought so.

- The T.O.

Dear Cyclones Ticket Office,

My dad is in jail for extortion. My mother has a gambling habit and relies on me to help pay her bills. My husband has left me for my best friend. My sixteen-year-old son has been expelled from school, and I can’t rein in his behavior. I find myself in a dark tunnel with no light at the end. What should I do?

-At The End Of My Rope

Dear ATEOMR,

We have a Fireworks Plan to light up your life! Fireworks always make people feel better. Also, this plan includes our Baracklyn Cyclones Night, a tribute to our new President Obama, who made a campaign promise of hope (and it sounds like you could use a little hope right now)! Problems solved. You’re welcome.

- The T.O.

See? That was easy! There's nothing too big or too bad for a Mini Plan to handle! Brooklyn Baseball: Saving the world one life at a time!

-- Joyce