Asian Heritage Night

Like many Asian Americans, I take a lot of liberties in making fun of my own culture and upbringing, usually to appalled reactions from my co-workers.

When I was first put in charge of Asian Heritage Night, I thought briefly of turning the game entertainment into a reenactment of a stereotypical (read: my) Asian upbringing: offering as special prizes free piano and violin lessons to a few (un)lucky fans, giving spontaneous math quizzes between innings, handing out college brochures from Harvard, Yale, Princeton, MIT, and Cornell to the first 1,500 kids to enter the ballpark, and allowing anyone who scored over a 1500 on the SAT’s (or these days, over 2300) to attend for free.

Then I was gently reminded by our front office that our games were supposed to be fun.

To that end, we have enlisted the help of one Yan Zhang Shaolin Kung Fu School, sponsored by the Flushing Development Center. They’ve performed for the Mets’ Asian Heritage Night, too, so you know they have to be of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon caliber (though our liability insurance prohibits them from flying through trees).

Chef One will also be at the ballpark with dumpling samplings, so bring your chopstick skills!

Our Beach Bums will be running through the crowd passing out klonton drums, and I will personally be re-naming members of our front office and player roster with special Asian names (e.g. Dave “Mischievous Troublemaker” Campanaro and Sharon “Shadow Ninja” Lundy).

Finally, the National Anthem singer will be performed by Faith Chyou, an Asian American professional singer based in New York. She’s also a Harvard grad, so you know her upbringing is legitimate.

Whether you’re Asian or not, this is going to be a fun night for all, so come out to the ballpark (and maybe I’ll assign you a special name)!

-- Joyce